Moon Swings

Mr. Fix It 1.

 So, of course, there’s a new lover in my life. Probably in all our lives, right? A new cat, a new dog. A new pair of Balenciaga’s. A new baby, a new friend. Well, my new love isn’t a friend or a dog. Well, let me not speak too soon. I’ve been recently texting this man I work with. He’s never been that cute to me, rather looks like a rough one, but after a few instances of seeing him be worthy in the workplace by moving roughage and standing on his words, I’ve become rather, curious about him. You see, I’ve been working in this place for 4 years. I’ve seen him all the while. Sneaking around me, eyeing me, longing to talk to or touch me. I could see and feel the energy coming from his eyes and body language. I ignored it. Ive always had a thing for boys prettier than me. My cousin even suggested that I look with my eyes less. Which wouldn’t have helped me anyway. A coworker of mine needed assistance, so she called for help. Help arrived but couldn’t figure out what to do or how to handle the task at hand. Help suggested that we just shut the machine down. As we all watched Help be no better than us, he appeared. He said, “No need to shut it off, all you need is spray” and some other manly tools I can’t think of. He left and came back with some equipment and a ready face. At that point, I had already made up in my mind, that if this man, fixes this problem, I’m going to marry him. He solved it. I watched him walk away humbly. I couldn’t tell if my heart was beating or my loins, I just knew blood was moving through my body. After watching this man solve a problem that no one else could, and do it diligently with no ego or need to brag, I melted. I found myself breathing hard and almost frantic. I was hot all over and damn near hysterical because he simply had the know-how and wasn’t fazed by his own talent. Lately, I’ve found myself popping up on him on projects. He’s often focused and secure in his work, offering advice to others and even calling a few of the final decisions. I always throw out a “Hey, they’re not working you too hard, are they?” I always get a quick “No, I got it”, as if I’m a distraction that he must be stern with. I’m fainting as I type this. My only concern at this moment is well; he hasn’t texted me back. We texted before my vacation in Memphis, during, and when I made it home last night. I texted him eagerly this morning at 8am, knowing I’d hear from him throughout the day. He wanted to see me, but I declined. I suggested he call me instead to keep things light and exciting for the Tuesday date we have planned. Gosh, I kind of wish I accepted the “See you later today?” plan. Just to see if he’d reach out. He agreed to the call, but no ringing has occurred. What’s also troubling is it’s his first day off after working 4 days for 10hours. He has noted to me several times this week that he’s often tired on the first day off. Hmm, which makes me wonder. Is he really that tired? Its now 4:03pm. A total of 8 hours since I last reached out. Maybe he’s at church? It is Sunday. Maybe he’s on another date? It is Sunday. Not sure. Maybe he is that tired. Maybe I’m just… untrusting.