Moon Swings

Is love ownership or freedom?

Since the beginning of life for me, love has always been something I can’t live without. Ive always loved flowers, so I picked them. Ive always loved my mother, so I distract her from her own life and make her be in mine. I love money, so I am saving it. I love boys, so I try to possess them. Ok, my mother is the only human I could get to stick around. Not by force but maybe because she wants to. Ive realized that men are not items unfortunately. We can’t just go into the toy section at Walmart, pick up the prettiest boy, and keep him to ourselves. Can we? Only if he wants to be kept. I mean, I’d feed him. I’d probably make him laugh, but he wouldn’t be real to me. He’d just be something pretty to brag about and carry around like a Prada clutch with pink rhinestones. Real love comes from real and raw emotions caused by infatuation, desire, and many other words that make people cringe at times. The only reason I love this toxic guy I cried over yesterday is because well, he gives me feelings. Happy feelings, sad feelings, and any other that can be felt. Is it all in my head? I mean, what if I never met the guy? Would those same feelings arise about someone else? Are we attaching ourselves to people only because we want to feel important? Aren’t we important enough to be alone and feel those same feelings about life in general? Who doesn’t want to experience a world of emotions through a person? It doesn’t seem like love without it. It’s pointless if you don’t. Do we love because the person makes us feel something, or is it love because we choose to feel?